Embracing my parents’ deaths in the future

It will happen.

Instead of living every day of my life as though it is my last, I live every day as though it is either of my parents’ last.

And I have lived as such for the last 10 years.

As a result, my life has become a massive long term project of planning for the eventual disposal of my parents’ belongings that I will find extremely difficult to let go of.

They include teapot sets big and small they loved to collect in their younger days. The books they loved and the academic papers they wrote. Their favourite clothes. The house that my family grew up in and have such fond memories of.

Prior to graduation, it was the exact opposite. I was accumulating things stemming from the need to succeed. But right now, I avoid buying things. In fact, I throw my personal things away in order they will not be a burden to my children when I pass on.

My sis and brother will pass on too. And so will every single family member, all of whom I hold dear.

Do I want to live forever? No I don’t.

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